Sorry for the delay, folks. I've been slogging my way through stacks of paperwork, and I finally have the results and stats to post for all four of UTC's tournaments from the summer. Also below are the results for Mix Masters, the biathlon for those who competed in both Muck Masters (trash) and Moc Masters (academic) in August. NAQT HS NCT MIRROR (academic, 6/25/05): Thanks again to the folks at NAQT for letting us mirror their high school championship. Those questions are just about the right level for a no-holds-barred summer tournament. The high school and just- graduated-from-high-school players present acquitted themselves well against us old fogeys. Aqua Teen Hunger Force wins the hard way, going into a 4-team playoff in 3rd place and thus having to win both a full round and a shootout against each of its playoff opponents. Results after the round robin were: Team Name Win Loss Points Opp Pts Diff/GM Emory Alums 10 - 0 4000 1545 245.50 It's the Nuts! (Vandy) 9 - 1 3760 1900 186.00 Aqua Teen Hunger Force (TN alums) 8 - 2 3525 1905 162.00 Mia Farrow, You a Pharaoh (KY + Campbell HS) 7 - 3 3010 1855 115.50 Barbaric Yawp (Fisher Catholic) 5 - 5 2545 2530 1.50 Spotswood Alums A 4 - 6 2130 2425 -29.50 Smoky Mtn. Home School 4 - 6 1870 2635 -76.50 Doug & Kelli (Fla.) 3 - 7 1850 2905 -105.50 Win Ben Stein(hice)'s Money (Alabama CC's) 2 - 8 1675 2835 -116.00 Spotswood Alums B 2 - 8 1350 2775 -142.50 Macon State 1 - 9 915 3320 -240.50 Semifinals: (1) Emory def. (4) KY + Campbell, 320-300 (3) Aqua Teen Hunger Force def. (2) Vandy 370-240; wins shootout 200- 40 Finals: (3) ATHF def. (1) Emory 375-230; wins shootout 135-110 Individual stats: The top 10 players were recognized as All-Stars. Special recognition was given to Daniel Douglas, David Bell, & Chris Bassett, the top 3 players from HS (or at least not-yet-college.) I can't remember if we announced this as such, but the Most Gloriously Wrong Answer went to Kelli Barone (Wrong answer: Whistler's Mother. Right answer: The Ring.) Note the spirited competition for the John Drennon Wiley Rollins Award for Outstanding Achievement in Buzzer Aggression, which went to Daniel Douglas with 13 negs. Player Team # 15 10 -5 Points Rounds PPG Matt Keller It's the Nuts! 25 49 4 845 10 84.50 Gerry Tansey Emory Alums 20 53 7 795 10 79.50 Chad Money Mia Farrow, You a Pharaoh 23 34 7 650 10 65.00 Jerry Lundegaard (Mike Sedlack) Barbaric Yawp 14 44 11 595 10 59.50 Daniel Douglas Spotswood Alums A 10 42 13 505 10 50.50 Doug Robeson Doug & Kelli 8 40 6 490 10 49.00 David Bell Smoky Mtn. Home School 6 36 6 420 10 42.00 Jim Sanford Win Ben Stein(hice)'s Money 5 34 4 395 10 39.50 Carl (Steve Taylor) Aqua Teen Hunger Force 15 18 11 350 9 38.89 Sarah Mahood Spotswood Alums B 8 26 7 345 10 34.50 Meatwad (Bronson Messer) Aqua Teen Hunger Force 9 22 5 330 10 33.00 Rick Carr Mia Farrow, You a Pharaoh 12 16 6 310 10 31.00 Steve Bahnaman Emory Alums 9 21 10 295 10 29.50 Frylock (Carol Guthrie) Aqua Teen Hunger Force 8 20 8 280 10 28.00 Glenn Allen Bobo Win Ben Stein(hice)'s Money 5 25 12 265 10 26.50 Kelli Wood Doug & Kelli 4 24 8 260 10 26.00 Saurabh Vishnubhakat It's the Nuts! 10 15 10 250 10 25.00 Chris Bassett Spotswood Alums A 4 22 8 240 10 24.00 Solomon Stein Emory Alums 3 20 1 240 10 24.00 Stephen Wise Macon State 6 17 11 205 10 20.50 Brady Juengel Smoky Mtn. Home School 4 7 3 115 6 19.17 Master Shake (Scotti Whitmire) Aqua Teen Hunger Force 3 13 3 160 10 16.00 Sam Duval Spotswood Alums B 1 14 4 135 10 13.50 John Kilby It's the Nuts! 4 8 2 130 10 13.00 B.J. Krug Smoky Mtn. Home School 3 11 6 125 10 12.50 Walter Sobchek (Ben Thimmes) Barbaric Yawp 5 6 3 120 10 12.00 Jenny Fierro Spotswood Alums B 1 10 1 110 10 11.00 Paul Facknitz Spotswood Alums A 2 9 4 100 10 10.00 Christopher "Manker" Mia Farrow, You a Pharaoh 1 11 6 95 10 9.50 Luke Morton Smoky Mtn. Home School 2 7 2 90 10 9.00 Travis Lightsey Macon State 0 8 0 80 9 8.89 Cameron Macon State 5 4 6 85 10 8.50 Karl Hungus (Kyle Rainier) Barbaric Yawp 1 10 7 80 10 8.00 Johnny "Manker" Mia Farrow, You a Pharaoh 3 4 1 80 10 8.00 Jacob Vannucci It's the Nuts! 1 0 0 15 2 7.50 Donnie Karavatsacz (Joe Nixon) Barbaric Yawp 0 1 0 10 3 3.33 Daniel Lay Win Ben Stein(hice)'s Money 0 2 0 20 10 2.00 Bunny Lebowski (Christine Kennedy) Barbaric Yawp 0 1 0 10 10 1.00 Brett Norris Macon State 1 3 8 5 10 0.50 Marge Gunderman (Jill Guinan) Barbaric Yawp 0 0 0 0 3 0.00 Josh Dobbs Smoky Mtn. Home School 0 0 0 0 4 0.00 SUMMER CAMP (trash, 6/26/05): The Madness of Curious George: Nerds in Paradise was the winning team, leading the field and defeating Death of Marat Safin outright in a playoff 301-280 to avoid a shootout. Team Name Win Loss Points Opp Pts Diff/GM The Madness of Curious George: Nerds in Paradise 5 - 1 1905 1050 142.50 Death of Marat Safin 4 - 2 1736 1015 120.17 The Starr Destroyers 3 - 3 1325 1460 -22.50 (those 3teams finished in the upper division before reseeding) Crosby, Stills, Nash, Young, Gifted and Black 4 - 3 1100 1112 -1.71 The Wonders of Sid Meier's Civilization 0 - 7 386 1815 -204.14 It's rare that teammates finish 1-2 for the John Drennon Wiley Rollins Award for Outstanding Achievement in Buzzer Aggression, but Macon State's Steve Taylor and Brett Norris accomplished just that at Summer Camp. Individual stats: Player Team # 10 -5 Points Rounds PPG Michael Kearney The Madness of Curious George: Nerds in Paradise 28 0 280 6 46.67 (Stephen Taylor) I am that I am Crosby, Stills, Nash, Young, Gifted and Black 30 9 255 7 36.43 Al Przygocki The Madness of Curious George: Nerds in Paradise 20 5 175 6 29.17 Adam Lipkin Death of Marat Safin 16 0 160 6 26.67 (John Kilby) Bart Starr The Starr Destroyers 17 4 150 6 25.00 Steve Bahnaman Death of Marat Safin 18 6 150 6 25.00 (Anthony Bush) Ringo Starr The Starr Destroyers 16 6 130 6 21.67 Chris Hendry The Madness of Curious George: Nerds in Paradise 14 4 120 6 20.00 (Robin Richards) Edwin Starr The Starr Destroyers 12 3 105 6 17.50 Solomon Stein Death of Marat Safin 10 0 100 6 16.67 (Bradley Juengel) ASTC The Wonders of Sid Meier's Civilization 11 4 90 7 12.86 Gerry Tansey Death of Marat Safin 9 3 75 6 12.50 (Travis Lightsey) Not that there's anything wrong with that Crosby, Stills, Nash, Young, Gifted and Black 9 2 80 7 11.43 (B J Krug) SETI The Wonders of Sid Meier's Civilization 9 5 65 7 9.29 (Jacob Vannucci) Kenneth Starr The Starr Destroyers 7 2 60 7 8.57 Andrew Feist Death of Marat Safin 6 2 50 6 8.33 (David Bell) Great Library The Wonders of Sid Meier's Civilization 6 1 55 7 7.86 (Brett Norris) Clever Nickname Crosby, Stills, Nash, Young, Gifted and Black 9 8 50 7 7.14 (Josh Dobbs) Leonardo The Wonders of Sid Meier's Civilization 2 0 20 7 2.86 Megan Clancy The Madness of Curious George: Nerds in Paradise 1 0 10 6 1.67 (Cameron) Monkey Balls Crosby, Stills, Nash, Young, Gifted and Black 1 0 10 7 1.43 (Luke Morton) Sun Tzu The Wonders of Sid Meier's Civilization 0 0 0 7 0.00 MUCK MASTERS (trash, 8/6/05): Thanks again to the folks at Michigan for letting us exchange packets with their Burns tournament. Thanks also to John Kilby and David Moore for writing the other rounds and editing the tournament, and to Jacob Vannucci for contributing a special guest round. I feel like I should apologize for playing, but John and David really wanted me to, and then Wally pointed out that he'd never actually gotten to be on a team with me.... These results will vary slightly from what was announced. We had one team leave at lunch and persuaded Dren Rollins to compete as a one- person exhibition team. In retrospect, since it didn't affect the outcome, I have exercised executive privilege and made his matches count after all. Final standings: Team Name Bracket Win Loss Points Opp Pts Diff/GM Mack the Spork (UTC) 10 - 1 3881 1897 180.36 Creedence Clearwater Revival Jolson (Lee) 9 - 2 3561 2015 140.55 Drunken Fighting Savage Warrior Redskins (Fla) 7 - 4 2771 2617 14.00 Outdated Commercial References (UGA) 6 - 5 3111 2306 73.18 (the above four teams were in upper division before reseeding) It's a Violent Pornography (Ky) 6 - 4 1523 2316 -79.30 exhibition -- Dren Rollins 3 - 3 1395 940 75.83 I'm not a Smart Man ... (Bevil) 3 - 8 1742 2697 -86.82 Sex, Drugs, and Rock the Casbah (Macon St) 3 - 8 1636 2392 -68.73 Girls with Low Self-Esteem (BU etc) 1 - 10 1416 2841 -129.55 Covenant Christian 0 - 3 100 1115 -338.33 Individual stats also differ from what was announced for a couple of players because there were typos that gave a couple of players nine extra negs. One of them, Steve Taylor, STILL tied for the most negs with Seth Kendall. However, we erred in awarding Steve the John Drennon Wiley Rollins Award for Outstanding Achievement in Buzzer Aggression. Based on the average per round, that more properly should be noted as going to the award's namesake, Dren Rollins. The top speed buzz went to Carter Pelham of Covenant Christian for getting Halo 2 on 2 words. (I deemed this more impressive than me getting the audio tossup of "Black Water" off the windchimes, especially since it's actually the second time I've done that.) The most gloriously wrong answer was by... Charlie Steinhice. Wrong answer: Howard the Duck. Right answer: Antwone Fisher. One other historic note: Mark Franklin of Outdated Commercial References became the first player in UTC trash tournament history to use an audio clip as his pseudonym, playing a mini-cassette of that not-Vivaldi music from the DeBeers ads. All-Star awards were given to the top ten players. Individual results: Player Team # 10 -5 Points Rounds PPG Dren Rollins exhibition 74 11 685 8 85.63 Charlie Steinhice Mack the Spork 67 11 615 11 55.91 Seth Kendall It's a Violent Pornography 43 12 370 8 46.25 Charlie Parker (Joseph Dion) Creedence Clearwater Revival Jolson 56 11 505 11 45.91 He-who-must-not-be-renamed (Stephen Taylor) Sex, Drugs, and Rock the Casbah 46 12 400 11 36.36 Keith Hudson Mack the Spork 41 5 385 11 35.00 Rich Corinthian Leather (James Quintong) Outdated Commercial References 31 3 295 9 32.78 (DeBeers) (Mark Franklin) Outdated Commercial References 33 4 310 10 31.00 Hawkeye (Jeff Zahnen) Drunken Fighting Savage Warrior Redskins 36 5 335 11 30.45 Finer than our GERMAN Knives?? (Robin Richards) Outdated Commercial References 29 3 275 10 27.50 Django Reinhardt (Michael Kearney) Creedence Clearwater Revival Jolson 31 8 270 11 24.55 Tony WONDER! (Nathan Bragg) Girls with Low Self-Esteem 25 6 220 9 24.44 Buzzes with Guesses (J.D. Hutchinson) Drunken Fighting Savage Warrior Redskins 23 3 215 11 19.55 Scalper of Liberals (Snoop Comer) Drunken Fighting Savage Warrior Redskins 23 3 215 11 19.55 Chris Pace I am not a smart man ... 23 5 205 11 18.64 Thelonius Monk (Ike Plemmons) Creedence Clearwater Revival Jolson 21 8 170 11 15.45 Drinker of Fire-Water (Mike Napier) Drunken Fighting Savage Warrior Redskins 18 3 165 11 15.00 I can't think of Anything (Travis Lightsey) Sex, Drugs, and Rock the Casbah 17 2 160 11 14.55 Adam Pinson I am not a smart man ... 18 5 155 11 14.09 Mayor Adam West (Saurabh) Girls with Low Self-Esteem 19 8 150 11 13.64 Glenn Allen Bobo I am not a smart man ... 17 5 145 11 13.18 Wally Edmondson Mack the Spork 15 2 140 11 12.73 Count Basie (Tyler Perrone) Creedence Clearwater Revival Jolson 14 2 130 11 11.82 Carter Pelham Covenant Christian 3 0 30 3 10.00 Jim Sanford I am not a smart man ... 12 7 85 11 7.73 Edith Bunker (Ruth Jackson) Girls with Low Self-Esteem 8 1 75 11 6.82 Nathan Douthit Covenant Christian 3 2 20 3 6.67 Karl Sorrells Covenant Christian 2 0 20 3 6.67 Jean Luc! (Jad) Outdated Commercial References 7 1 65 10 6.50 I'm high on PHP (Brett Norris) Sex, Drugs, and Rock the Casbah 11 9 65 11 5.91 Jacob Vannucci Mack the Spork 7 1 65 11 5.91 Sally Struthers (Josh Clanton) Girls with Low Self-Esteem 9 7 55 10 5.50 Gerald Patton It's a Violent Pornography 5 3 35 8 4.38 I have no idea (Cameron) Sex, Drugs, and Rock the Casbah 1 0 10 11 0.91 Steven Price Covenant Christian 0 0 0 3 0.00 Maggie Lizer (Carissa Moore) Girls with Low Self-Esteem 0 0 0 9 0.00 MOC MASTERS (academic, 8/7/05) Final standings: Team Name Win Loss Points Opp Pts Diff/GM Alabama Cultural Fallacies 9 - 0 2790 1745 116.11 Snoop's Farewell Tour 7 - 2 2840 1275 173.89 Florida State et al. 5 - 4 1755 1945 -21.11 Natalee Holloway Fan Club 6 - 3 2390 1775 68.33 Especially Cringeworthy 6 - 3 2505 1675 92.22 Decepticons 3 - 6 1755 1925 -18.89 Colorless Refuse 4 - 5 1870 1915 -5.00 Ted Kennedy Sea-Air Rescue Squad 2 - 7 1670 2020 -38.89 Hey, guys! At the end of Book 6, Hermione DIES! 3 - 6 1600 2075 - 52.78 Stultum fortuna iuvat (aka Kentucky Non-Seth) 0 - 9 180 3005 -313.89 There was heated competition for the John Drennon Wiley Rollins Award for Outstanding Achievement in Buzzer Aggression., with Saurabh Vishnubhakat going the extra mile to rack up 15 negs and take the title. It may or may not have been noted at the time, but the best speed buzz went to Jeff Zahnen for getting Steely Dan from 5 words. Individual results: Player Team # 10 -5 Points Rounds PPG Seth Kendall Especially Cringeworthy 95 9 905 9 100.56 Wesley Matthews Alabama Cultural Fallacies 78 10 730 9 81.11 Snoop Comer Snoop's Farewell Tour (Florida) 49 13 425 9 47.22 Matt Alford Decepticons 47 12 410 9 45.56 B (Billy Beyer) Florida State et. al. 46 12 400 9 44.44 Chad Money Colorless Refuse 41 3 395 9 43.89 Joran Van der Sloot (Adam Pinson) Natalee Holloway Fan Club 36 1 355 9 39.44 Keith Hudson Hey, guys! At the end of book 6, Hermione DIES! (UTC) 31 4 290 9 32.22 David Moore Hey, guys! At the end of book 6, Hermione DIES! (UTC) 13 2 120 4 30.00 Willy Kirkland Colorless Refuse 24 0 240 9 26.67 Mike Napier Snoop's Farewell Tour (Florida) 25 5 225 9 25.00 Chappaquidick Rescue Crew 2 (Stephen webb) Ted Kennedy Sea-Air Rescue Squad (GA Tech) 25 5 225 9 25.00 Satish Kalpoe (Chris Pace) Natalee Holloway Fan Club 25 6 220 9 24.44 P (Sean) Florida State et. al. 24 4 220 9 24.44 Saurabh Vishnubhakat Ted Kennedy Sea-Air Rescue Squad (GA Tech) 28 15 205 9 22.78 Jeff Zahnen Snoop's Farewell Tour (Florida) 19 2 180 9 20.00 Deepak Kalpoe (Glenn Allen Bobo) Natalee Holloway Fan Club 17 3 155 9 17.22 Grandmaster Flash of Shakedown Cash (Gavin) Ted Kennedy Sea-Air Rescue Squad (GA Tech) 14 4 120 9 13.33 Potter? I don't even know her (John Kilby) Hey, guys! At the end of book 6, Hermione DIES! (UTC) 13 2 120 9 13.33 Sam Decepticons 13 3 115 9 12.78 Jason Paik Alabama Cultural Fallacies 14 7 105 9 11.67 Bala Decepticons 12 4 100 9 11.11 Paul Van der Sloot (Jim Sanford) Natalee Holloway Fan Club 11 3 95 9 10.56 Nick Siler Colorless Refuse 12 7 85 9 9.44 Gerald Patton Stultum fortuna iuvat (aka Kentuck Non-Seth) 14 12 80 9 8.89 Jacob Vannucci Hey, guys! At the end of book 6, Hermione DIES! (UTC) 7 1 65 8 8.13 J.D. Hutchinson Snoop's Farewell Tour (Florida) 5 3 35 6 5.83 G (Mike) Florida State et. al. 3 0 30 9 3.33 Chris Decepticons 3 2 20 8 2.50 H (Steven) Florida State et. al. 1 1 5 9 0.56 MIX MASTERS 8/6/05-8/7/05 (combined results for Muck Masters and Moc Masters for those partaking of both) Florida took the title, with an average winning percentage of 71% for the two tournaments. Members of the Florida squad each took home eggbeaters, which we intend will become the ceremonial prize for this tournament henceforth. Similarly, the top five overall scorers each received a wire whisk, with combined top scorer Seth Kendall getting a deluxe set of three. (Other Mix Masters All-Stars were Snoop Comer, Keith Hudson, Adam Pinson, and Jeff Zahnen.) MUCK MASTERS MOC MASTERS MIX MASTERS Team Name Win Loss Pct Win Loss Pct Pct Florida 7 - 4 0.636 7 - 2 0.778 0.707 Kendall 6 - 4 0.600 6 - 3 0.667 0.633 UTC 10 - 1 0.909 3 - 6 0.333 0.621 Bevill 3 - 8 0.273 6 - 3 0.667 0.470 Patton 6 - 4 0.600 0 - 9 0.000 0.300
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